The other day I watched a mom bring in a class treat for her
child’s birthday. It was a display of
perfect cubes of rice krispy treats and blue jello stacked ever so creatively to
look like a scene from minecraft.
Instantly I felt guilt and inadequacy sweep over me. Why was I not that cool of a mom? I have the same amount of time in my day as
she does hers. Why can’t I find the time
to do things like that? Now if I
struggled with those thoughts I am sure that every other mother out there does
as well. That stupid comparison game
where you either think you are better because your child has a better costume
for history day and everyone compliments her on it or you think you are worse
because it is all you could do to pull yourself out of bed and put a hat on his
head for history day. Whoa, whoa,
whoa. Ladies what are we doing to
ourselves. We have the most important
job in our children’s lives and I know that God has equipped you to be the
mother of that specific child. Maybe the
minecraft scene isn’t important to your kid.
Heck mine doesn’t even like minecraft so if I showed up with that same
snack it wouldn’t mean a darn thing to him.
I want to challenge each of you to dig deeper into your child’s heart
and discover what is important to him or her.
Then do what is important to that individual. Don’t compare yourself to other moms and
think that they have it all together.
Because I can guarantee you that the mom that looks completely put
together lays in bed at night thinking that she doesn’t measure up. As a mom I used to not realize how important
I was in my children’s lives. I mean I
wasn’t really doing anything to change them or teach them. That was until I had the very unique opportunity
to have a professional investigate me as a parent. It was called a Parental Responsibilities
Evaluation. This stranger came into my
life, ripped open every area where he could have found fault, dug through the
history of me as a mom. Who changed the
diapers? Who gave the baths? Who brushed their teeth? Who took them to the doctor? Who was there on your child’s first day of
school? Who did the child’s homework
with them? Wait….those things matter, I
thought to myself? I had critiqued
myself as a mom over and over again and thought I was nothing special up to
this point. But as this professional
began to peel back the layers I could see the mother’s heart that God had placed
inside of me. We as mothers just do what
needs to be done. I never stopped to
think that each time I changed a diaper I was teaching my child about
unconditional love. I never stopped to
think that while I was doing homework with my child I was showing them that I
would be there when they felt like they couldn’t do life on their own. I never stopped to think that when I was
teaching them how to bathe I really was showing them that life gets messy but
nothing a good scrubbing can’t take away.
I never stopped to think that while I was playing catch with my son
really I was showing him that you never know what life is going to throw at you
but with the right equipment you can make still make a play. I never stopped to think that while I was
dancing with my daughters in the kitchen really I was telling them that they
are beautiful princesses worthy of the love of a KING. I remember sitting across from this
professional one day and he said to me “You are an incredible mother and your
children are blessed to have you. You
sell yourself short and you don’t realize the impact you are having”. So please mother’s everywhere give yourself a
pat on the back. You are changing more
than you think. And the work you are
doing does not go unnoticed by the most important people in your life, the
little eyes that are watching you, the little hands that you are holding, those
are the people that matter. Not the mom
that made a better costume than you or the mom that spent hours in the kitchen
preparing that snack. God created you
for your child. Fully embrace the job
you have been gifted.
